Why You Should Always Hike Volcanoes in a Group...

Last Saturday, I had the distinct pleasure of hiking Volcan Pacaya, which is about 40 km southwest of Guatemala City. At an altitude of approximately 2,500 meters, this is certainly not an Andean volcano like Cotopaxi in Ecuador. However, Pacaya is unruly and began its most recent active period in 1965.

Unfortunately, the safest and most economical way to climb Pacaya is with a horde of predominantly out-of-shape tourists. So after 2 hours of picking up passengers, transfering to a bigger bus near the Pollo Campero (apparently where everything important happens in Antigua), navigating morning traffic...we made it to Pacaya National Park.

It is a 2 to 3 hour climb to the top of Pacaya, depending on your level of fitness and willingess to push through the burning sensation in your legs (or feet, in my case, due to a poor decision to 'blaze my own trail'). Because this is a volcano, it is an uphill climb. I mention this because one memorable American girl on our trip loudly remarked at minute 10 of the hike that she did not realize this was going to be an uphill hike.

I find it quite interesting that the biggest "huffers" were American...but not to worry, enterprising locals stand ready with their steady-footed horses repeating "Taxi...taxi..." until another unfit hiker surrenders. The biggest "puffers", as in, let me light a cigarette at hour 2 of an uphill climb, were European and Asian. Yet, bunking all medical research and statistics, the smokers were the leaders of the pack while most of the Americans needed horses to complete a 3 mile hike.

We hiked through fog, dirt, rain, gravel, sun...and finally, hit lava rock. This is the point where my hiking buddy was helping a struggling hiker and I decided to go ahead and hike up a different part of the volcano. Disregard whatever travel literature you may encounter on Pacaya...there are no trails or markings. You climb up, then you slide down. Who needs a trail?

I realized we were getting close to the summit when I looked down as I scampered up my trail and thought, "Why are these rocks gray?" As my shoes started to warm nicely, I realized I was literally hiking over steaming crevices in a volcano, at least 10 meters from the official "trail". In my week of SCUBA diving with Corey, I learned why we never dive alone (duh). I now understand why one should remain with the group when hiking a volcano. Fortunately, my guardian angel (who has worked major overtime the past couple of years), helped me navigate the life-sized barbeque pit and return to the company of other hikers.

Finally, after 3 hours of hiking and a near melting experience, we made it...just in time to enjoy the unimaginable glow of lava at dusk.
While many of the guys entertained themselves by igniting their walking sticks in the lava (interestingly, not a single female seemed remotely interested in this endeavor)...I continued to reflect with amazement that this volcano was completely pristine, oozing lava without a single fence or "Caution" sign in sight. Want to swim in the lava to get a really great photograph for Grandma? Try it out! I can guarantee, there was no one at Pacaya to stop you.

I wish this story ended with a reflection on the delights of the dark sky, fluorescent lava, and pulsing stars. Instead, our volcano hike concluded with a 3 hour descent in pure darkness. I knew I brought my headlamp for some reason! Unfortunately, it remained in my hotel room with my common sense.

Why You Should Ride the Chicken Bus...

It´s been 10 days since my last blog entry, many apologies...Now that I am back in Xela, I felt it was time to reflect on my recent chicken bus journey from Antigua.

Riding the Chicken Bus is an experience most tourists avoid as they sit in the climate-controlled comfort of the Pullman bus (1st class bus), comparing tchotchke purchases from over-priced mercados. The 1st class bus is truly an unfortunate choice, as they are slower and in my opinion, far less entertaining.

On my recent 7 hour journey from Antigua to Xela (via Guatemala City in a torrential downpour), I had the pleasure of reflecting on my tips for riding the Chicken Bus in style here in Guatemala:

First of all, when you enter a Chicken Bus, it is preferable to hurl yourself into the retrofitted school bus through the rear emergency door. In my opinion, this adds to the excitement and you will feel the slight thrill of directly breathing exhaust fumes.

Make sure to sit in close proximity to the front of the bus. This will allow you an excellent view of the traveling salesmen as they show you alarming photographs of various moles, warts, lesions and other possible travesties that are easily cured with their miracle cream. On the bus from Guatemala City to Xela on Monday, I was fortunate enough to have a traveling salesman who doubled as an evangelical preacher. This resulted in a nearly hour long discussion of how warts and negativity are closely related. He also had photographs of Barack Obama´s infected toenails to further prove his cause. (For the record, much to my shock, I would say he sold at least 7 tubes of miracle cream on my bus.)

If at all possible, grab a window seat. This will allow you, when the bus reaches capacity of 8 persons across (that´s right...3 on each bench, 2 suspended by the pressure of the 6 others in an astounding defiance of gravity), to at least have one half of your body touching a neutral surface.

For entertainment on your bus rides, count the number of people who attempt to sell you ice cream cones from a cooler before 9 am in the morning. My top count so far (direct bus to Panajachel in July) = 6.

Befriend your neighbors. Guatemalans are extremely friendly and helpful. Just be forewarned: you may end up holding a screaming baby for a couple hours while mom sleeps on your shoulder.

If you are at all prone to motion sickness, take a double-dose of medication beforehand. Fortunately, as my family knows well, my only symptom is overwhelming sleepiness. In a school bus traveling 100 mph on mountain roads, this can result in other unfortunate side effects for some.

And off to the next adventure...A final dinner here in Xela with my teacher and her wonderful children.

And next time, pictures of the volcano climb! I can promise real lava and near death experiences.

Buena suerte!

Caribbean Dreams...and Nightmares

Now that we have safely returned from Honduras...It's time for the update on what to see and what to avoid in the Bay Islands. What a memorable journey...

What to See and Do
DIVE. DIVE. DIVE.
The underwater world along the coral reefs of Utila is astounding. Fish of every color dart through coral crevices and populate the waters. It's amazing. Hypnotize yourself with the constant hum of your regulator as you breath deeply underwater!

Above...my Open Water Dive Partner, Corey...Here she is, becoming part of the live art exhibit at the Jade Seahorse in Utila. The Jade Seahorse is a bizarre hotel/restaurant/bar/mosaic nightmare created by a very nice couple with too much time and too many broken dishes lingering on the property. Corey was delighted when we found this hotel...as for me, I felt like I was trapped in a bad Caribbean version of Alice in Wonderland. Nonetheless, for the eccentric and craft store addicts...the Jade Seahorse is worth a visit. If nothing else, it's a good example of why a person needs more than one hobby.

GO HORSEBACK RIDING

Allow me to introduce you to Thunder, my little caballo with an affinity for speed and danger. The best part of horseback riding in Utila is the unbelievable view from Pumpkin Hill, overlooking the entire island, and that you get to go riding on the airport tarmac. That's right...look both ways! Here we go, horseback riding across the tarmac after a plane lands. Apparently, you are not allowed to ride your horses to the baggage claim without paying a toll. However, you can ride your horse along the tarmac for free.

DIVE MORE.
This is the look of an exhausted SCUBA diver. SCUBA diving is not really taxing on the body, until it's over. Unlike running, when you actually see the stopping point as relief from discomfort, when diving...it's complete serenity and joy. The discomfort comes later. One learns to adjust to temporary deafness in one ear (possibly one of the most annoying afflictions!) and constant swaying you feel even on land.

What to AVOID

Super-Human Strength Mosquitos
Does anyone have a recommendation for shampoo, body wash, and laundry soap with DEET? Both Corey and I left Utila with approximately 75 bites between us. The mosquitos on this island bit through jeans...yet another reason to dive more. Mosquitos don't live 60 feet underwater.

Roatan
Unless you enjoy being completely ripped off my overly enterprising retirees, avoid this island. The beach is beautiful, but otherwise...it's a super-expensive version of a bad Florida beach town with terrible food (Think Applebee's quality at Manhattan prices...oh wait, they are building an Applebee's there! WHY?)

The Food
The food in Utila and Roatan was horrible. There is no Honduran cuisine available, mostly fried and unhealthy American foods. Pizza, hamburgers, french fries, chicken fingers...If you can eat junk food for days without complaint, move to the Bay Islands. Otherwise, pack an extra suitcase with Kashi bars and trail mix.

Corey and I are safely settled in Guatemala City now, heading to Antigua tomorrow. Words cannot describe how happy I am to be back in Guatemala, where the people are genuine and the culture is alive. When the presence of tourists, retirees, and cruise ships transforms a beautiful island like Roatan into a complete Caribbean nightmare, I know it's time to remember the importance of individuality. Cultures can, and do, erode because of insensitivity and lack of investment. Roatan is becoming a complete extension of Florida. What's next? A Super WalMart on the beach?

The Adventures in Traveling Week in Review

This past week has held many adventurous moments, a couple of frightening experiences, and the promise of much excitement yet to come.

To set the stage for this "Week In Review", pictured above is where I am currently writing from, Room #5 at Deep Blue Diving in Utila, Honduras.

The people of this small Caribbean Sea locale are charming evidence of the sea-loving spirit.

Corey and I first arrived here on the catamaran of an appropriately grumpy sailor, Captain Vern. No land lover, this grouchy old seaman turned downright charming once we hit open water. He even offered me a pillow (after 3 hours of sleep the night before...it was much appreciated).

We are here in Utila with an objective: to obtain open water scuba certification. Now that we have successfully concluded Day 2 of the course with our trusty and highly qualified instructor, Matt, I am fairly confident that both Corey and I will pass the course. Of course, teachers are terrible students and I am no exception. I work ahead in the textbook, failing to listen to the video as it plays, while simutaneously doodling all over the margins. I ask too many questions, I talk while the teacher is talking...good thing Corey and I have a very patient instructor entirely for ourselves! We have done 2 very easy dives thus far, and tomorrow morning we head out for dive 3. No whale sharks...yet.

So, before I drift away in my tropical slumber...


The Adventures in Traveling Week in Review
1) The UNBELIEVABLY amazing Wisin y Yandel Concert in Guatemala City
How can you NOT love an amazing duo with a song entitled "Mujeres in the Club" with 50 Cent? His signature line in this song..."She like me. Need a new song for the lazy days of August? I highly recommend "Sexy Movimiento". (Special thank you to my concert companion, Edwin, for being the official photographer and bodyguard.)

2) The bus ride to Guatemala City...why bother with 1st class buses in Guatemala? For $8, I had approximately 1/2 of a seat and 6" of leg room in my assigned seat. On the chicken bus, for $3, I can have half of a school bus seat and PLENTY of leg room. What's going on here?!

3) Practicing my speed walking talents by crossing the entire San Salvador "International" Airport in 4 minutes for our flight to Honduras. Even more impressive -- my luggage made it too! Airline of choice for Latin American travel = TACA.

4) Corey and I realizing that no one, aside from grumpy Captain Vern and some very tired dive instructors, awakens before noon on the island of Roatan. Hungry? Too bad. And trust me, there is no food service on Captain Vern's catamaran.

5) Learning to SCUBA dive. I may actually grow to prefer life underwater, as I find the sound of my regulator to be intoxicatingly hypnotic. Plus, fish don't seem to mind staring.

6) Realizing, as I talk with Corey and others here at the Dive Resort, how much I love and miss Guatemala. I am so fortunate to have found a place in the hearts of wonderful people in Xela to share their vibrant culture and beautiful language.

Tomorrow...I promise (technology allowing)...pictures of Team Gunston in SCUBA gear. And of course, Corey petting a 30' whale shark.

Don't drink coffee? How do you pass the time here in Xela?

I have unwavering confidence that in the years to come, when people ask what I miss most about Xela, it will be the long afternoons spent chatting and people-watching over coffee. The cafe culture here in Xela is thriving, in part to the lack of any chain coffee shops. The uniqueness of the cafe atmosphere is not violated by the uniformity of the white and green cup and overstuffed pastry case. Starbucks has no place here.

Of course, I will not begin to bash Starbucks. I can recall many joyful life moments by the Starbucks I frequented at the time. I can remember nearly weeping, yes weeping, with joy when I found the Starbucks in Heathrow after more than a month of only instant coffee in India. (This deprivation was made even worse by no coffee at all for nearly a week, during which I consumed mass quantities of milky tea in hot pursuit of the 'kick' that coffee provides the sore body after a long run in diesel-filled climes.)

I can still taste the salty tears in my venti coffee, even if I was forced to use only milk to soften its blow (is half-n-half solely an American wonder?), at the Starbucks in Lima on the day I left Ecuador. Alone and wondering what I would do in Lima solo until Corey arrived, I ended up seeking comfort in one of my favorite indulgences.

Not only do I not miss Starbucks here in Xela, but the view from my favorite cafe is hardly comparable with that of the lovely Potomac Yards parking lot:

This is Parque Central, as seen from El Balcon del Enriques in Xela. The best drinks here are the cappuccino (for those who like their coffee 'suave'), the cafe con leche (members of the 'fuerte' club), and the chocolate con leche (for the non-coffee drinkers, lovers and sugar-addicted). And of course, it is absolutely necessary to close your cafe experience with a 1 quetzal mini-macaroon.

Part of the reason I enjoy El Balcon is for its people-watching advantages. Through personal experiences, I have learned that spying on others is the third-most popular sport in Xela. Like any self-respecting Guatemalan town, the most popular pasttime is futbol (soccer). Second to futbol is comparing prices paid for fruits and vegetables in various market stalls throughout the city. "You paid 8 quetzales for a papaya?! That's so expensive!" Yes, I did. I will happily pay $1 US for a papaya anytime.

And ranking a close third here in Xela: spying on other people.

In order to best "people-watch", the balcony provides multiple long-legged seats so neck exhaustion is easily avoided. I learned, from my Spanish teacher and her family, that the best way to people-watch is to keep your cell phone handy for texting and subversive picture taking. Since Xela is a small town, it usually takes approximately 3 - 4 minutes to spy a familiar face (that's for me...imagine if you actually lived here!). If you are lucky, that friend will be accompanied by a stranger! Take a picture! Text to friends and family immediately! Commence speculation.

People-watching is only part of the sport that is spying. The other key component is to then report your findings to the person, in a non-confrontational but "gotcha" manner. Today, at lunch, Tia Margarita asked me, "Muñeca, why did you go to Cafe El Cuartito yesterday?" Apparently, her neighbor's friend had reported that I did not make my usual afternoon jaunt to Cafe Baviera or El Balcon. Disculpe, Tia.

Of course, this makes Parque Central the true litmus test for whether or not your new 'novio' is serious or not. According to Ana Lucia, the savvy 19 year old daughter of my Spanish teacher, if a guy won't hold your hand in Parque Central, he's just wasting your time (or he has another girlfriend/wife, who undoubtedly has friends who are currently spying him walking with you...)

Some of My Favorite Things

Recently, a fellow traveler of mine inquired, "What are your favorite purchases thus far in Guatemala?" I suppose this person intended for me to recite a list of souvenirs ranging from one tchotchke to the next...Instead, I divulged my passion for my new hot water bottle. It has revolutionized my sleeping ability on cold, Xela nights. This is officially the BEST 50 quetzales ($6) I have spent in Guatemala. And the water is still hot enough in the morning for coffee! I can actually make my Nescafe in bed (okay, I have not done this...yet.)

Second to my hot water bottle (as if the lovely Scottish print is not sign enough of its usefulness)...ranks my cursed Guatemalan cell phone.

I consider this cell phone cursed for the following reasons:

a) I must rely on my 7 year-old house brother to assist me in "recharging" the phone with more minutes. Here in Guatemala, this involves walking to the tienda at the end of my street and purchasing more minutes.

b) I have no idea how much minutes cost, nor how to check my balance. I do not understand "triple" days or "10 for 1" promotions. This is Antonio's responsibility. (Yes, he is 7 years old.)

c) The telephone does not have a touch screen. On this first day I purchased this phone, I confess, I tried dialing by touching the plastic screen. I have been ruined by my American iPhone.

d) I am embarrassed to admit that I think I used to own this exact phone back in 2001 or so. Somehow, between then and now, I forgot everything. I learned today, after 4 weeks, how to lock the keys, which is essential since my phone randomly decides to make phone calls and waste my precious minutes (acquired with much difficultly - for me).

For the record, I love my cell phone because it keeps me connected to my new Guatemalan friends and family. But I completely blame Apple for stunting my technological growth. I am sure Antonio, in his 7 year-old mind, is wondering, in beautifully rapid Spanish, how this blond woman with her fancy iPhone can possibly expect to learn Spanish if she cannot navigate the intricacies of purchasing minutes from Claro for her cell phone. Just today, we had a 10 minute conversation on whether I wanted to purchase a card of minutes or have the tienda recharge my phone. Antonio explained the advantages of both -- 2 times -- in offensively slow Spanish. I still have no idea what to do...except give him 100 Quetzales and say "Por favor?"

The Traveler's Dilemma...

The more I travel, the more I realize that life presents many difficult choices. For example, when visiting a new city, after a long day of travel in a retrofitted school bus, you may find yourself famished and exhausted. Selecting a restaurant can be tricky...does the speed of the service match your desire? Will the food meet your expectations? And most importantly, will the food give you diarrhea?

(Apologies: That may be graphic, but any traveler in the developing world asks this question, hopefully in their head.)

Fortunately, this is not a tale of diarrhea. Instead, it is the tale of making the tough choice when a country of very, very few major music concerts schedules 2 for the SAME night.

In one corner, we have Pitbull. The oh-so-endearing Pitbull, with the intoxicating 1-2-3-4. Yes, it is the song of the summer here in Guatemala.

In the other corner, we have Wisin & Yandel. Arguably, they are one of the best acts in reggaeton. Everyone has heard "Rakata" -- and yes, some people sneer in distaste for reggaeton, but those people would fall into the "musically judgmental" category:)

What is a serious-minded world geography teacher to do? This is important cultural research and demands deliberation. In the end, Wisin & Yandel prevailed. The opportunity to see such a groundbreaking group trumped my desire to hear Pitbull recite 1-2-3-4 multiple times, in person.

So, Thursday night I will be enjoying my VIP ticket to the Wisin & Yandel concert. And of course, I appreciate that it is considerably cheaper than a nosebleed seat at the Verizon Center. On with the cultural research...